MY PATERNAL UNCLES AND AUNTS.
When I think about my parents and paternal uncles and aunts it is soothing.Even though they belonged to below middle-class family,even though they were having so many difference of opinions in the families,which are characteristic features of any family, they were able to manage to travel on their track to preserve their family prestige.They let their track be parallel for good extent.I think that they might have decided not to interfere any one's family matters unnecessarily.When needs arise they might have come together either to solve the problem if it was a problem or celebrate their togetherness to mean what a family really means.
Even though they were dwelling in the same street,I didn't see them quarreling with each other with war of words or war of actions.The usual family tussles were there but they were not taken seriously.During family occasions and festivals the elders came out with good efforts to make their children to understand what a family means through which they made room for children to learn basic manners and basic courtesy.
For example,during get together occasions they made children to be always ready to be at the service of elders.When elders called the youngsters for one reason or the other,they younger must respond in such a way.i.e by answering them,by addressing them with respective relation and must be present there i.e in front of them in no time..i.e as coming mother! coming uncle!coming grand ma and so on.
While children were having their meals they made to sit in a row and were made to help their younger ones to sit properly and to have their meals properly.When the children were served with some delicious food served in a common plate, the children were made to know that it was the elder children's moral duty that the elders should leave some extra food for the youngest one of the family.
The families which were having grand parents,the children of that family whether they in nuclear family or in joint family the children were trained in such a way to help their grand- parents.Usually the then grand-parents,did their evening worship in an elaborate manner.At that time the children would present themselves there to get the blessing of the God through their grand-parents by letting their head on their grand-parents feet.The children were made to believe that their grand-parents were the messengers of God.
There will be no partiality or differences had been shown among children.If one went wrong it was mentioned in no time.If the wrong was done by the elder children they were warned by saying that they must be the living good example for the younger ones. If it was by younger he was also warned by advising them to take advise from their elders.
When any child of the family happened to see his or her father or uncle leaving for the shop they used to demand for their favorite snacks. There was some sort of direct supervisions on everyone by every one of the family which brought a security to the whole family even though we were as nuclear family family in the later stages of life.
As the agriculture was predominant occupation in our villages,every one of the family from grand parents to grand children had their share of work for their age.As they produced their own food themselves and as the least importance had been given to the education,the usage of money was very limited.When the children were sent to the shops to buy something,they must tally their balance sheet.
The elders of the family were being good role -models in strengthening the family bond and to bring a good discipline to family through their every day of life.
My paternal uncles and aunts who were younger to my parents used to visit my parents every early morning.I think it would have given my ill-health mother a moral support.They had a good respect for my parents.For any sort family matters they left the decision making authority to my parents.My other aunts (My father's sisters, who were destined to others places,were used to visit us very often and used to stay with us and our uncles' family for some time with regular intervals.The good interaction,the sharing of good suggestion, the harmless teasing among themselves were extended to their children naturally.
Thus the children of the families were made to learn caring and sharing,give and take respect,taking responsibilities for their age,developing the helping tendency,ready to correct their mistakes,learn to live with the nature without disturbing it,learn to know the great importance of one's self-esteem and how to honor their roles for the family to preserve the family prestige through their practical learning.
These were some excerpts from my paternal paradise sweet memories through which I observed and absorbed the values of family what it really means and the values of life.
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