Friday, May 30, 2014

Good for everythingthing

 The world is a dangerous place to live.

Not because of the people who are evil.

But because of the people

who don't do anything about it.                                  
                                                                                                                   
                                                                                                                  Albert Einstein




     Beena got into the home around seven in the evening after another tiresome day of that week.She is the Assistant Headmistress in a Government School which is fifteen kilometers away from her place.There their Annual sports day function has been going on.Being as the Good Assistant Headmistress of that school, the Head Master comfortably keeps transferring his responsibilities on her.For the past one week her schedule has been very hectic.From school to the bus-stop,she has to climb nearly one kilometer up-hill and if she has any luck to get her bus in time she can reach home around six in the evening,where she has to walk the distance around one kilometer to her home.


  Beena is in a joint family.She loves to be in the joint family.At present, she is with a eleven members joint family and she is the eldest daughter-in-law among three in the family.As she is being the eldest daughter-in-law of the family,she is expected to take more and more responsibilities where she finds very difficult to balance in and out of the family. She is so good but without having the knowledge of being taken as granted by every one of the family,she tries her best to balance her carrier with her family by sacrificing many of her crucial state of living.


   As her family Heads egos are very big,they very often emphasizing their state of honor either with their unwanted, unhealthy languages or with not pleasing attitudes.They have no idea about how they do bring their own pride to the earth by complaining about their own family members to the every visitor.More over, her husband keeps telling that as they are the eldest of the family,they must be a good role model to his siblings and nears and dears.So let us try to cope with our Heads of the family, even though they don't mean their roles.


   Beena has been taking her husband's word to her heart and brain for nearly twenty years.All these years,she doesn't expect any help from anybody else in the family even after many exploitation,many manipulation, many disgraces.She has been leading a very good mechanical life where her husband's help is indeed very spectacular to direct her in that direction of mechanical life. He really doesn't want any chaos in the family as he is not at all ready to face any sort of difference of opinions among the family members.But God only knows that whether he himself realizes his roles.


   Gradually,the house starts loosing its charm as home,the family members starts loosing their faith to be in the joint family system.Even though the whole take home salary of the earning members have been handed to the family Heads with perfect calculations,there is no satisfaction.Nobody in the family is allowed to spend even a small part of their earned money on their own will which makes them to think 'What a hell '.They have no idea about the role of their money in the hands of the family Heads.Being 'Terror ' of the family,the daughters's -in-law family dare not to visit their daughters or to take their daughter to their place to bring some comfort in them.Thus the family Heads run the family in the wrong and dangerous direction.


   But this year sports day is an eye opener for Beena to tackle her family Heads as well as the Head Master..As she is exhausted to the core with her all time dual roles at home as well as at her working place,now her body refuses to cope with the lightening speed of her mind.As a result,the frustration emerges which  many times about to show its ugly face. Beena stops her machines at her mechanical work shop.i.e. Her  mechanical life.When she looks back,she is able to understand that none to be blamed.Being the eldest daughter -in-law of the family she let herself allows others for being herself granted for everything by helping them to escape from the untimely and unwanted wrath of the family Heads. Then what is the meaning of complaining her pain to herself.


     The sports day comes to an end with an arising of  beautiful Rainbow from the clouds of Beena. This is the great time to disclose her suggestions to the Head Master for a ' Divide and rule Policy ' which seems to be much more good for the good administration of the school.She needs her own space at her working place as well as at her home.She needs the same for her beloved family members also.She lists out her suggestions and strategies for a good administration of a big and good joint family.


     Beena's list is ready now to help her to make her life happy and spacious through which she feels she can bring the same to the every one of her beloved family members.The first thing,she has to do is,she must be dare to disclose her unhappiness to the family Heads about their way of treating her along with her family members.Then she ought to come out with the following suggestions.In the beginning,there may be earth quakes but it has to be made to settle down in one point or the other with minimum damage by bringing them to the reality.Here goes her list.

1.' Divide and Rule Policy ' at home also seems to be good for everything for internal,external and financial matters.

2.Beena decides not to give her entire salary to the family Heads which is seems to be barrier to implement her many ideas for the welfare of the family.50% of her salary would reach her family Heads and the remaining 50% would stay with her.This is applicable to all earning family members.

3.Appointing a maid servant is necessary.

4.Making the cuisine a vibrant one with all necessary appliances one by one.

5.The present four room accommodation is not sufficient for eleven members joint family and for the regular visits of the guests.No privacy for any one else in the family. A duplex independent house is the need of the hour.As there are more than six earning members in the family,even all earning members are asked to share with their 50% salary, the rent seems to be affordable.

6.There must be a proper planning for own a house as quick as possible.

7.Week ends must be with so many fun.Every week end dinner must be ordered with the favorite choices of the family members in turn.

8.Funds can be created through proper planning of saving which could be utilized for kid's education,for celebrating festivals,for celebrating family events,for the medical expenses of the family members,for occasional small tours and so on.Once we get into this building a happy joint family structure,there may be more and more ideas and strategies may appear.

   Definitely,this strategy seems to bring fresh air in the family where the sultry, the ' Ego ' of the family would vanish in the thin air.          


 


 

Thursday, May 22, 2014

Co-Operation

 Indeed there must be a will

No doubt there will be a way still


 Do you want to know for what?

Nothing else.Just to co-operate.


Co-operation commences from home,

And it begins with our Dad and Mom.


They are seniors to us,sure,

More than 25 years.It is true.


So let us respect them for their age,

That experienced age placed them in good image.


Respect means co-operation.Let us just do it.

Then let us respect our siblings,through love in it.


For our elder siblings,let our love bend our head.

for our younger,let the same raise both our heads.


No disgrace to kids in and out,

Which is the initial stride to reach out.


Boy or Girl, just let us take them up,

When they deserve with values to come up.


Let us never bias with Gender,

No doubts,it leads to a big disaster.


Let us get related to our relatives,

For very good alternatives.


Let our place be a good harbor,

For the sailing ships of our neighbors.



Remember always, we are the part of the society,

So let us together to bring some goodness in it.It is so easy.
 


Let our governing body be wise with moral education,

This is the need of the hour.Let us analyze it before every election.


Let our Government govern us with all courtesy,

And let us co-operate with it with less protest and more patriotism.



These are all some signs of co-operation,

To bring the goodness in the Harmony operation. 







Friday, May 16, 2014

Self Respect is the Best Respect

   When we talk about one's self respect, many times for many reasons we let it down with no knowledge of its great importance for some temporary benefits.In the long run, it is a known fact that this self respect is the only factor to guard us from all sorts of unwanted events which may be big disturbance to the peace of a family.

   In a family,when one cares about one's own self respect means no doubt,he cares about his own family's self respect.In other words,the family's pride would be preserved.The person would be  a good role model to one's own family circle, and outside one's family circle.Here is a one good and pleased life style of a couple whose life style was based on this precious ' Self Respect ' which led them a smooth sailing in their family journey.

   In a big joint family,where the eldest brother along with his sweetheart,took the responsibility of his family, after the sudden demise of his father.He was around thirty five and his wife was around
thirty at that time.He had to take care of his nine siblings with his mother.In their village they were in the good books of the village.It means the couple was in a position to preserve their self respect.

   One day,after the funeral ceremonies of his father got over,the eldest son had a private discussion with his wife."Honey! I do hope that you have understood the present situation as it is. As we are the eldest of the family, and as per Darma,the righteousness,we must play the role as parents,literary as parents to my siblings,where the youngest one is just ten years old.I have no idea about his understanding about his big loss,his loving father.I think it would take some time for mother too to come back to normalcy".

   "One more sister is to be married off.I know the weight of the responsibilities is too much for us.But I have a strong faith on your support without which definitely I will not be able to do anything.But at the same time I don't want to put any pressure on you just because you are my wife.If you are ready to make up your mind and heart to go along with me,we can make the task as easy as possible as parents.As parents indeed.I feel this is the right thing to preserve our self respect which I have inherited from my parents.At the same time I do promise you that even after these responsibilities definitely I will be your good old better half".

   His Sweetheart,held his hands,through which she conveyed her whole and soul were always belonging to him.As the eldest son was in a good post in a government office and by God's grace,as they were belonging to upper middle class,and as they were in the good books of their village the couple made their family journey as smooth as possible on all ups and downs to preserve their self-respect and their family's self- respect.As he and his wife did act at his mother's word,
naturally,his siblings had to act at their eldest brother and sister-in law words.

    As the eldest son and his sweet heart led a life entirely based on self respect,they never let down themselves and their family at any cost. Still their names are having their fragrance in the village even after the period of their life times,nearly twenty and ten years.

   I would like to quote one more incident where my little one was so conscious about her self-respect, even at her tender age. One day,I was taking a after noon nap,my younger daughter was playing with her friend at our home.She was doing her second standard.While they were playing,something was dropped with a big bang.I got up with high intensity of anger and I was about to scold her.She instantly shifted to our mother tongue,requested me," Mom! Please don't scold me in front of my friend.You do it a bit later". With no waiting for my response,she turned to her friend,shifted to their common language,"Friend! I am going to sleep now.We shall play in the evening. Bye! See you!".After locking the door,she came back and stood in front of me and said," I am sorry Mom! for disturbing your nap.Now I am here to have your punishment".



                                   " SELF RESPECT IS THE BEST RESPECT ".

 

Friday, May 9, 2014

BUILD IN A DAY

                                                  
    Alan had no idea about how to pursue his higher studies.He just completed his under graduate course in the Government Collage which is situated nearly ten kilo meters away from his village.He was an ardent lover of Mathematics.He very badly wanted to do his post graduate course.In his school final exam he got cent per cent in his Mathematics Exam.He was the pet of his Mathematics teachers of all classes in the school level.

   In the collage level also his Department Teachers admired his Mathematics skill and encouraged him.They were in the opinion that he would continue his studies there to the teaching level as to their assumption that he would be a smart professor one day. But in a blip, a top'sy -turv'y atmosphere put a load of pressure on him to look for a job for the sake of his family.

   Alan had no idea about any sort of job.He wondered who would offer a job for this minimum qualification.With heavy thoughts he was lying on its back and kept on searching for an answer from the ceiling.One day he made up his mind."God! I won't blame you for anything happened to my family.As the eldest child of this family,I am in a position to feed five persons of my family including me.But God! Please
consider my sincere prayer that I always want to be with that good  friend " Hope " as his shadow.I begin my friendship with him as my first " Hope " is that sincere prayers are always answered"

   Alan had a survey to check whether any opportunity through anybody to get any job for the sake of his family.On his inquiry he found that one of his reliable senior collage friends was working as a Supervisor in a Textile Company.With a good hope, he reached his friend's place.Before he uttered anything,his friend held his hands and told,"I heard the bad news that happened to your family.You know! At times like these we must collect our all internal and external strength.As you are the eldest child of your family you must be stronger for ever to support your parents and to guide your younger siblings.I know it is easier to say than to bear the untimely responsibilities.But my only humble suggestion is never ever lose hope on God and on yourself ."

   As his friend was a close relative to the M.D. of that Textile Company and also, as he is in the good book of his M.D.he could secure the same category of Supervisor post for Alan.These sort of posts are usually need a minimum qualification of Diploma in Textile Technology.His friend was doing that course through correspondence course.And this sort of works are usually on shift basis.But as Alan was totally new hand,the M.D.appointed him for general shift for one year, as a probationary period to learn things under the direct supervision of the respective Supervisors.Alan was advised by his M.D. to join the same course through correspondence as his friend as early as possible.

   Alan was given an opportunity to share bath attached, a big room in the upstairs and with a comfortable balcony  with his four other would be friends of the same category at the backyard of the company.The Company procured a vast area for various purposes in the future.In the downstairs of the same building there was a very big Dormitory with attached bath rooms on either side for the labors of the Company.There was a Mess in the adjacent building with spic and span appearance where good food was guaranteed on considerable charge.In the Mess there were separate rooms for the managers,for the supervisors and for the labors.Alan did like this atmosphere very much.His profuse thanks to his friend itself conveyed everything.

   Alan's room mates had their own interests along with their own shifts.The common aspect among them was,their mutual respect on each other and their interests.It was a boon for every one.And also they were having a good helping tendency which was a greater boon for the same room mates.As Alan was junior to all of them and came to know about his family's bad time,they were very ready to help him by all means.

   Alan was on his schedule.He wanted to make his schedule with some perfection.So he tried his best to make it.He liked proverbs and wisdom of words from eminent personalities who are expressing their intense knowledge and vast experiences of their respective fields.One day,as usual in the evening time he was going through some versions of this kind.Nobody was in the room.They had their own schedule.While he was going through these versions,one particular version by one of the eminent person,had its registration on his mind.

   i.e. " Six honest serving men who taught me all I knew.They are,

1.What,

2.Why,

3.When,

4.Where,

5 Who And

6. How ".

   Depending on our mindset with certain  related atmosphere, certain things start their registration on our mind.That is the reason for the repeated advertisements of all sorts.If 1% of the world population comes under this sort of suitable meeting point at one time means it would help their business to take to a great
height where all the expenditure they spend on the advertisements are worthy.

   Alan was at this meeting point.He started to sort them out.

1.What -What is my priority?

   " My loving family.For the sake of them I try my best to make them fearless to face the future" .

2.Why -Why do you give priority to your family ?

   " Because till the date they have been doing their best to make me a sound human.Now it is my turn to make their place save and happy.As the eldest child, it is my prime duty to be in the roles of my parents which is the need of the hour ".

3.When-When are you going to start rolling your roles?.

   " Right now.First I find some extra good opportunities to earn good money to keep myself and my beloved family in a good position.Before that in one way or the other I should pay back something worthy to my good  friend who secured this job for the sake of myself and for my loving family".

4.Where- Where can you get these opportunities?

   " As I am in general shift,I can make use of my evenings to make some extra money.As of now my option is to join any tuition center nearby to teach Mathematics for school level children which seems to be the good investment of my Mathematical skill ".

5.Who - Who is going to help me ?

 " The same old good friend who helped me to secure this job.As I am a stranger of this city,he could help me.And also I can seek the same help from my other room mates and the other friends in the campus".

6.How- How are you going to make your earned money to bring justice to its roles?

   " At present my take home salary is 6,000.I must bring my all sorts of expenditure within the limit of 1,000 bucks.As my boarding and lodging are within the limit of 600 bucks,I think I can manage with the remaining 400 for my other expenditure.I must save the other 5000 bucks as a whole for the sake of my family".

   " I must get an opportunity in  any tuition center to earn extra money.To my level,I can expect 1000 bucks a month.From it I must strictly save 500 bucks for two years to pay back my good friend as a small gift as a gesture of gratitude who secured this job for me..With the remaining 500 bucks plus with the remaining 400 bucks of my salary I should learn to manage the other expenditure as elegant as possible.After two years I am going to pursue my studies in the textile technology through correspondence where I hope I can manage the fee structure".

   After finished doing his own project which seemed to be possible with his good hope Alan resorted to the arena of his peace of mind.i.e.



                         Alan's Rome is built in A day. 

   .




   

Monday, May 5, 2014

Decisions to Discipline



   To-day is the beginning of the first term exam holidays.I am in standard Nine.I am below very average student.I  am one of the students who have been coming under that category,i.e. just pass category where students like us are for mere enrollment of numbers in the class and our presence or absence doesn't make any impact in the class room activities.

   On the other hand,as I am belonging to middle class family and my parents bothering finds no bounds." Unless we children are ready to lean on the work hard side,it is obvious that their financial conditions never allow them to take any effort to make us pursue our studies ".This is the version that have been reminder for me for umpteen times.As I never open my ears to this version which in turn, my mind is also not directed to open.

   As usual the school reopened.I was not serious with the marks I got.On the evening of the same day,there was a circular from principal office that there would be combine class for the students from standard nine and from standard eleven.That  circular gave us no idea.Usually,combined classes would be taken for the different sections of the same class.But this seemed to be different.

   We were asked to assemble in the hall which is adjacent to the principal room.There also,even we inquired our seniors whether they had any idea about the combine class,they obviously had no clue at all.After ten minutes or so,our principal entered into the room and we got up with our true respect,as this Principal is a person who have a real concern with students' welfare.

   The Principal with his crystal clear voice,"Students! I won't take much of your precious time.Only for few minutes,I ask you to be serious to lend your ears.Depending on your seriousness on the matter,you will make up your mind to observe the intensity of the matter which in turn directs your brain to do the needful.So here,
the proper passing on the matter is very important.Hence I expect your 100%attention".

   He gave a pause,where he expected us to collect all our ears to him.After a pause he continued with the same crystal clear voice,"I went through your first term marks.Except a handful of students in ninth and eleventh form really have no idea about their present position which is not good.Not good at all.I want to clear one thing,If you people are not able stand in the first two ranks in your limited strength of the class means, imagine what would be your position in the higher studies level where your circle would be bigger so as your competitive level"

   We turned to each other.Something pricked our minds.The Principal,"You may wonder,why I have made to assemble all the sections of two different classes.i.e. Nine and Eleven.Because these  two classes are tend to be your turning point.This stage is the crucial basic learning stage.If you understand the basic concept of
every subject with proper mindset,you will survive in your future world where it is designed by the concept "Survival of the fittest "with the tremendous technological development.Almost all national competitive exams based on the basic concept which are at preset in standard nine and standard eleven.These basic concepts which may lead to various inventions and discoveries in future.So please understand that unless you don't understand these basic concepts you will find no road to go ahead.i.e.you will be powerless.You will not be able to secure a powerful spectacular carrier.With the present opportunities to get good education,it would be easy and valued to land on any field based on merit.So, now the ball is in your court to decide whether you want to survive in this highly sophisticated competitive structure or to vanish in the thin air".He looked around the whole class and wished us " Good Luck " and off the hall.

  There was a silence.Utter silence.Slowly one by one we were also off the hall.The Principal indeed gave us a stern warning.I decided to survive.A value based survival only has its meaning.I had no idea about my own ability.And I had no idea how long the present spirit which has been supplied by our respectful Principal would survive.But before this spirit gets drained I have to save it.I have to save it for ever.For that I have to plan now.

   At home,my silence brought some awkwardness to my parents.After dinner I as usual went to bed.In the first place,I decided to draw some plans.Then I decided to bring a good discipline to my plans.i.e. to my decisions.After some self analysis and calculating the pros and cons of my plans,I resorted to this sort of decisions with my stringent methods of discipline.

1.Total faith on God.

2.Be positive.

A strong belief that as I am being with God,He is always there to help me whenever I need any sort of help.So I can make things possible.

3. Recognize and berecognized.

When my mind goes in the direction where it is directed which brings good result means,I should appreciate it.i.e.I should give compliments to myself and at the same time I should never fail to give my profuse thanks to God.If it goes wrong,I should nip in the bud with the help of God.For this also I should never fail to give my profuse thanks to God who is definitely going to help me in mending  my way on my every stride.

4.Time management.

To assume an approximate time for every task to bring a good intensity in my concentration.

5.Cleaning.

I must clean my mind on regular basis with the help of God  by doing some internal and external exercises to build a sound body and sound mind to eliminate any sort of unwanted thoughts.It is a known fact that a sound body and sound mind are interrelated and each in turn help each other to make things possible. A crystal clear mind with a good fit body has more power to absorb.I observed.

   How true!that " A well begun is half done" version.I could feel that gradual building up of my confidence in me.Definitely I will Let it grow.

           




Friday, May 2, 2014

Power is Knowledge.

   Power draws from knowledge.This is universal truth.But the perception of some people who are always running after money with no knowledge of what is actual power and one wonders why they are racing after it like lunatics.These peoples have two negative sides of the same coin.One side is that they are in the mindset that the only duty of their life is to bring all the money from the whole world to their Locker as Ghost Riders.The other side is that they are not supposed to spend any cent for anything,for anybody at any cost as if it is a unwritten stringent rule for them to follow.Their only motto is saving money with no purpose.No doubt they are very big losers.

   Many times,at many places,these people become' laughing stocks ' and  ' frustrating stocks ' as they never have a knowledge to honor their roles where their money has to play key role on certain occasions to preserve their pride and prestige.They always expect other's money to play their own role.Even some people who are sound enough with this money power, are also in this state of mindset is really irritating.In fact they deluded themselves that among all the powers they are possessing,the money power is the greatest power of all power and through this sort of mindset  they let their prime power" respect " get ruined.They always never mind their respect.Their only policy is taking, not giving.This state is very pathetic.

   Whatever the power one possess, the power is considered to be a real power when it is attached with the righteous thing ' Respect '.With no respect attached to any sort of power a man possess,it is considered to be nothing.i.e. Not a thing at all. i.e.This sort of people, naturally wouldn't be any one's good books.This is a very big draw back for them.

   Whatever power a man possess,it would be recognized as power when it is able to bring name and fame to that person through which he could be approachable to certain extent, makes his dears and nears comfortable.i.e.The Faith.When such persons are not at all ready to be transparent to his close related circle, in the course of time,they would never be given importance on crucial family decision making process which may let them get isolated.

    There are many occasions would come for every one at any stage of our life time,where men power only is the need of the hour,not money power.This is certain.Example the times when we are ill and hospitalized or bed ridden,or during some grand family occasions,during our retired life  and so on.Even though our money can play all outside roles,we need our own men power of all age group for all occasions with real concern for inner roles,especially for moral support,guidance, and for good company and support.In fact,when we are ill or well,being circled by our own men power is the spectacular good display to show our strength,which is the real strength indeed.

   This real strength would get strengthened further with all other power we possess and this would be a concrete check point to other negative powers, if any around us,where the negative powers have no power but have fear to drive a sword between our good relation.

   So this is the ultimate points to the persons who are always running behind the money with no purpose,
neglecting his or her own nears and dears would be paid dearly.How means;

1.This sort of persons at first place are not considered to be a human being.They have been dragged to the ground level from '  living things '  to ' non living things ' as "It".i.e. They have no respect which in turn bring no concern and no faith.

2.They get isolated from their entire family.

3.In the beginning of their life time,when they are in hale and healthy,they may not consider this big loss.But in the later period of life time,the loneliness and frustrations would be the biggest savings which they really don't want but at that time even their money power is not able to help them to get rid of it.

4.Their big money power itself would be a big threat to themselves as they have no idea about what to do with that unplanned money.

5.Their subtle inner voice,which have been neglected all these years,now it has its own time and voice to keep reminding their blunders and they have no choice but to lose their health,happiness and peace of mind.Definitely they will feel bad that it would be much more better to extend their helping money hand than this non-stopping torture of mind by rubbing the salt on the wounds,the blunders.But the truth would be like that,the time they realize their mistakes,there would be no chance to rectify them.Because it is too late.

   So to escape from all these unwanted consequences from our on coming nightmares which are very certain for such money minded people,

1. First make sure that your money power should draw some respect for you and never let it to ruin your respect.

2. Build a good relationship with your money with good planning for your personal life and for maintaining a good family rapport.

3..Money should be circulated to certain extent among your reliable dears and nears where it is the prime place to enhance your respect.This respect will get popularized by your own relatives to the outer circle of your family.

4.Try to pay back with your money when need arises as a gesture of real gratitude.

5.Be transparent with some percentage of your money  with one or two reliable potential people in and around your family to start some small new ventures where your money power along with your respect as well as your earned men power would be stable.

   In short,try to understand that like savings of money power for various purposes for various periods,savings of men power is also  equally important.In fact men power is far more important than money power.You can arrange for money power with the help of real concerned men power but you can't arrange concerned men power with money power.So if you want to be wise to bring comfort all through your life try to have some knowledge and wisdom to earn men power all through your life than money power as we have no idea that when and where we need real concerned men power.